Off With Their 'Eads!

Okay, I've just fired the entire committee, every sorry last one of 'em. It started when I thought we were out of cinnamon graham crackers (Who lets a person run out of cinnamon graham crackers?) and escalated into choruses of "That wasn't part of my job description" and "Nobody told me to buy cinnamon graham crackers." Anyway, it feels good to be alone again. As it turns out, there was a box of cinnamon graham crackers hiding behind the sweet potatoes, but that's water under the bridge now, right?

Last night, I dreamed that I sold my beloved BMW (Birdy) and bought an unidentified (and evidently unseen) sports car. I had regrets almost immediately and asked if I could change my mind. Two ladies had very quickly typed up the paperwork and weren't to be deterred by my change of heart. "Do you want to get me fired?," the grizzlier one asked me. "No," I stammered, thinking that she looked far too old to have a job anyway. At the end, I decided that I would have a lawyer (Get ready, Jimmy!) look it over and see if the deal was legal. When I woke up, I was incredibly thankful that I hadn't actually bargained my car away. I now plan to drive that car until it falls apart.

For those of you in the know, the sale is now going to be at the shop in Marietta (evidently, when I decided otherwise, I had had one too many mojitos). For those of you not in the know, that last sentence is a figment of your imagination.

On a more personal note (and because I'm too lazy to send out multiple emails):

Dear Aunt Bobbie,
Please stop calling regarding dog money and your dwindling stock of Depends. We have only agreed to see you once a month, and currently, it is my brother's turn.

Dear Marc,
Will you ever return from Raleigh so that I can give you your Christmas present?

Dear Bill,
Please see the previous note to Aunt Bobbie.

Dear Grace,
Yes, you may come visit any time you please.

and, finally,
Dear Paul,
How does Longhorn sound?

Okay, enough typing for one morning. I have another busy day in the world of commerce ahead of me (and many changes to make due to the previously mentioned Mojito-induced decision).